2 Years

2 years ago today, I left Maine for good and moved to Chattanooga. It has been 2 of the most challenging years of my life but God has been so faithful in His promise to sustain and satisfy me. At times He did this in great isolation, other times was through my amazing siblings whom He used to encourage me and remind me how important it was for me to be with my family. Lately, His undeserved blessing of friendships, multiple Christ-honoring friendships, have been another one of His tools to not only sustain and satisfy but also to shine light on little, and big, areas where I have allowed pain, and bitterness to stew for many, many years. Through these friendships I have learned so much about Christ and so much about myself. He is using these Godly men and women to refine me in ways I didn't know needed refinement, bringing to the surface SO MANY issues in my soul I never realized that I needed to deal with. Apparently, that's the thing about being close with godly people, they keep you accountable haha. I am often reminded how undeserving I am of these amazing men and women that God has graciously given me and at times it causes great panic. This isn't a "feel bad for me" statement, just merely the truth. I've heard many people tell me that I deserve friend like this but I whole heartedly disagree. Anyone who has been reading my blog for some time knows how i feel about the word deserve. We (every single human being) deserve nothing more than death and hell, certainly none of us deserve friendships, especially ones that mirror Christ. But deserve or not, it's an amazing gift of grace and one I have been cherishing for many months now. A gift that makes losing (geographically) my best friends and siblings, Scott and Shanon and my amazingly sweet little niece Ellie, back to Maine slightly less hard. A gift that helps me keep my instant flight compulsion at bay, even while knowing they will be back, living in the most beautiful state, frequenting my favorite places, and Ellie will grow up without her aunties close by.
God has proved His never-ending benevolence over the last 2 years, and more visibly to me in the last 8 months and I stand in complete awe. I'm so excited to see what He is going to do with this next year here in Chattanooga for me, my younger siblings, and my dear friends, and what He is going to do with Scott, Shan, and Ellie and my Mainers in Maine.
"Only goodness and faithful love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord as long as I live." Psalm 23:6

~Jennanana