Trip to NJ and Other Such Ramblings

I'm sitting here listening to Narcotic by Dead Poetic, playing the air bass guitar and trying to think of what it was I said "hey, I should blog about that". And I know what you're thinking... who plays the air bass?

I went to New Jersey last weekend with my dear mumzy. We went down for the weekend to see the band Seventh Day Slumber. It was great to see those guys and get away for a bit. It also made me realize how very much I hate how I am living my life. Ever since the divorce I feel like I have done so many things to make myself a better person. I have become closer to God and I love that but I have also allowed myself to put things on hold. Maybe I needed that for a while to re-find and re-make myself but enough's enough. I'm stuck in a seriously dead-end job living in my home town afraid to go into town for fear of seeing my exhusband's family. I can't do this much longer. I have to find something to do with my passion for Jesus and music. When I think about it I don't understand my hesitation. I know God will take care of my needs no matter what the case, but at the same time I don't believe I was given responsibilities to just walk away from them. Like the debt from my car that I am in. God tells us to pay our debts (Romans 13:8). If I don't have a job or prospects of a job or something like that I'm not going to have the money to pay my outrageously expensive car payment. Then there's the whole health insurance thing. I am diabetic and have a newly diagnosed thyroid issue both of which are expensive. So, as you see, it's not practical for me to "just go". I've been completely distracted by the sounds of Deas Vail to think of any more to write on this subject... But speaking of the sounds of Deas Vail here are some blog-worthy lyrics from their song A Lover's Charm:

Don’t cry, love, oh don’t cry.
You know I won’t let you go.
Cause I gave everything tonight so that you could come back home
with a smile upon your face and the morning in your arms.
I changed everything in this place because you’re worth a lover’s charm.


Night!
~Jennanana

I Feeeel Happy! (you know, Monty Python)

So here is the promised blog for Friday night! I know, I know everyone was paralyzed in excited anticipation for this one. The billions who read this blog have been plaguing my email in box ever since... ok, I can no longer think of anything witty to say that would imply my reading audience is anything bigger than a few people who are ultimately scarred for life after reading these... ANYWAY!
Friday night! It was awesome... the end.
No, I wouldn't do that haha. Well, I got there around 5:30 and was informed I would have to stand outside until the doors opened at like 6:30... I was totally ok with that, even though it was only like 20 degrees. I was super surprised to find that I was the only one waiting that early for such an awesome concert but alas, it IS Maine. So as I patiently awaited the arrival of my sister and good friends (The Williams) I bounced up and down and kinda tried to stay warm. Apparently I looked ridiculous because Josh, the leader of the Atmosphere Church, took pity on me and let me inside the warm hall. It was nice of him, but I would have stayed outside for 5 more hours to see SDS in Maine if need be (wow, I sound like a fruit cake). So I am just hanging out in the hall when I notice the merch table for SDS and saw Jeremy setting up the merch and such. We talked for a while and it was really nice. I got to meet Elliott who is the new drummer for SDS (for now?). He was wicked awesome and I'm hoping he'll be drumming with them for a while! After talking with Jeremy for a while Shanon, Ken and Melissa showed up and we went to claim some seats in the auditorium then we went to look at the merchandise for SDS and the other bands. We rand into Sandy, a very good friend who works with Soul Fest and The Wrecking often, and we adopted her for the night! I also ran into Chrispy, who I swear is getting taller ever time I see him, he established that it is I who is shrinking... sad. Sooooooo finally the show started and a band called The Beautiful Oblivion opened. They were pretty good but I felt super old because the guys int he band looked like they were 12 and you could seriously see over the heads of most of the people in the audience haha. Anyway they had a great Emery meets a toned down UnderOath feel to them. The next band that played was Among The Thirsty. I had actually seem them before at Jam Fest back in May. They were good also but not really my type of music. The drummer totally reminded me of Darren (The Wrecking) just a little younger with nicer hair ;-). THEN, the moment I had been waiting for for 6 and a half years (not eight as I was corrected by Jeremy) Seventh Day Slumber, playing on a stage in Maine! Before they came on when the lights were all off and the intro music was starting Jen, Shanon, Sandy, Ken (i think) and I started an S-D-S chant. Sadly it did not catch on I think the crowd didn't know what we were yelling. Then the guys came out and TOTALLY ROCKED MY FACE OFF! Haha, as always! The show was amazing! The news songs are totally amazing! I'm so psyched for the new record, I think they said it would be out in March. Joseph did an amazing job giving his testimony, I've heard it a million times and I still have a hard time not getting all teary eyed. God is so absolutely amazing. It blows my mind that I ever tried to live this life without Him, without us being as close as we are now. I guess that is one thing I can thank the divorce for, I have learned so much about God and His grace and become so COMPLETELY and MADLY in love with Him during this time of pain and heartache. Joe did an alter call (do they still call it that?) and a good 80 percent of the people were down on the floor committing their lives to Jesus. I don't think I've ever seen anything like that in Maine before, I was truly blessed.
After the show we went and had the guys sign some shirts we bought and I was talking to Joe about the Teen Hope Line. I really have been feeling that I need to be in some sort of ministry and about 3 weeks ago the Teen Hope Line idea re entered my mind and hasn't left ever since. Jeremy and Joe were both very encouraging about the whole thing and I'm pretty sure it is what I am supposed to do next. I've been so stuck here in my hometown, not doing anything but trying to live and I am so sick of it. I want to be out making a difference for God and I think that this is my chance. So we left and went to Denny's and I was super hyped. I still am. I'm a little scared and my brain won't stop thinking of all the ways I won't be able to do this IE all my debt from the divorce, medical insurance, Cadence, but I think if this is where God wants me to go I will be able to figure all this out... no, HE will be able to figure it all out, I just need to keep my trust where it belongs!

Wellllll, now that I have recapped the evening I'm going to go to the gym then to the special worship service at Oak Hill with The Atmosphere Church... I haven't been back to Oak Hill since Liz graduated... should be interesting.
Have a loverly Sunday everyone (yes, the billions that read this!)
Blessings,
~Jennanana

Good Lord, Good Times

Sheeez....Can anyone believe it's already November? It seems we were just ringing in the new year at Jason's house with all my super awesome friends.
Time is a weird thing, I remember being young and "happy" and time went by so slow. Now that I'm old and "not-so-happy" time just seems to fly by like something else! I guess that is just another beautiful blessing from God. I don't know what I would do if time were going by slowly through these past couple of years.
It's so weird how God continues to bless us... With it being the first Sunday of the month, we did communion at church on Sunday and Scooter ( YES SCOOTER!!!) dedicated it, or whatever it's called, and he quoted a passage from Exodus 12...(it's long, but worth it)
1The LORD said to Moses and Aaron in Egypt, 2 "This month is to be for you the first month, the first month of your year. 3 Tell the whole community of Israel that on the tenth day of this month each man is to take a lamb [a] for his family, one for each household. 4 If any household is too small for a whole lamb, they must share one with their nearest neighbor, having taken into account the number of people there are. You are to determine the amount of lamb needed in accordance with what each person will eat. 5 The animals you choose must be year-old males without defect, and you may take them from the sheep or the goats. 6 Take care of them until the fourteenth day of the month, when all the people of the community of Israel must slaughter them at twilight. 7 Then they are to take some of the blood and put it on the sides and tops of the doorframes of the houses where they eat the lambs. 8 That same night they are to eat the meat roasted over the fire, along with bitter herbs, and bread made without yeast. 9 Do not eat the meat raw or cooked in water, but roast it over the fire—head, legs and inner parts. 10 Do not leave any of it till morning; if some is left till morning, you must burn it. 11 This is how you are to eat it: with your cloak tucked into your belt, your sandals on your feet and your staff in your hand. Eat it in haste; it is the LORD's Passover.

12 "On that same night I will pass through Egypt and strike down every firstborn—both men and animals—and I will bring judgment on all the gods of Egypt. I am the LORD. 13 The blood will be a sign for you on the houses where you are; and when I see the blood, I will pass over you. No destructive plague will touch you when I strike Egypt.
14 "This is a day you are to commemorate; for the generations to come you shall celebrate it as a festival to the LORD -a lasting ordinance. 15 For seven days you are to eat bread made without yeast. On the first day remove the yeast from your houses, for whoever eats anything with yeast in it from the first day through the seventh must be cut off from Israel. 16 On the first day hold a sacred assembly, and another one on the seventh day. Do no work at all on these days, except to prepare food for everyone to eat—that is all you may do.
17 "Celebrate the Feast of Unleavened Bread, because it was on this very day that I brought your divisions out of Egypt. Celebrate this day as a lasting ordinance for the generations to come. 18 In the first month you are to eat bread made without yeast, from the evening of the fourteenth day until the evening of the twenty-first day. 19 For seven days no yeast is to be found in your houses. And whoever eats anything with yeast in it must be cut off from the community of Israel, whether he is an alien or native-born. 20 Eat nothing made with yeast. Wherever you live, you must eat unleavened bread."
21 Then Moses summoned all the elders of Israel and said to them, "Go at once and select the animals for your families and slaughter the Passover lamb. 22 Take a bunch of hyssop, dip it into the blood in the basin and put some of the blood on the top and on both sides of the doorframe. Not one of you shall go out the door of his house until morning. 23 When the LORD goes through the land to strike down the Egyptians, he will see the blood on the top and sides of the doorframe and will pass over that doorway, and he will not permit the destroyer to enter your houses and strike you down.
24 "Obey these instructions as a lasting ordinance for you and your descendants. 25 When you enter the land that the LORD will give you as he promised, observe this ceremony. 26 And when your children ask you, 'What does this ceremony mean to you?' 27 then tell them, 'It is the Passover sacrifice to the LORD, who passed over the houses of the Israelite's in Egypt and spared our homes when he struck down the Egyptians.' " Then the people bowed down and worshiped. 28 The Israelite's did just what the LORD commanded Moses and Aaron.

Isn't is amazing, the picture God was painting even HUNDREDS of years before Jesus came to save us. The blood of the innocent slain lamb would save you and make death pass over you without being overtaken by it. This gets me excited. Makes me want to run around and chant "DEATH IS NOT WELCOME HERE" or "DEATH WON'T BE FOUND HERE" or "CAN'T TOUCH THIS" haha... but it all goes right back to the same thing.... why? And it amazes me still... I think it always will, which is good because it helps keep me grounded. God WANTS us to be with him. He is zealous over us. He LONGS for us to call him Abba (daddy) Father.

So the Satisfied Tour came on Sunday. It was like the most fun I've had in a really long time. I finally realized I have more than like 3 friends. And I realized that my friends are freeking awesome! Ken and Melissa...They are both so selfless. They give give give and they don't just give. They GIVE! And bless. They are amazing, basically if they are involved in something its gonna be super awesome. Then Scott and Shanon, well they let me invade their space ALL THE TIME! Seriously I don't know what I would have done if it weren't for them in the beginning of the whole divorce. Then Jensui... She has always been there for me. My comic relief, my silly friend. She's the only one I could totally act silly and hyper with and not get that look... oh you know what look i'm referring to... I hate that look, but with Jensui we're just ourselves and fun! And we can even disagree now and like not get all fight-like about it. And then Bernie... He's just super hilarious and, though he doesn't know much about Jason Varitek, he is pretty smart! We can eve talk about Pentacel, and he got me a soda! And then April. Though we aren't very close and haven't known each other long I think she's the shiznit! She has 2 awesome kids and is just so cool and nice.
Anyway it was super awesome to have ALL these, and more (yes MORE) all in one place supporting each other and just having a fun time. I was not even all shy and stuff. Although I kinda feel bad for picking on that kid Jordan so ruthlessly... SPEAKING OF RUTH! They were so amazing on stage. And such nice and real. It was an honor to meet them and help support their awesome ministry. I think these guys were even more low key then Seventh Day Slumber... and for those of you who know me know that's a bold statement.
We were able to go to Denny's after the show with ALL the guys from DecembeRadio and Ruth, along with some..maybe all of the guys in SevenGlory. It was so awesome b/c we were all just really tired and hungry and I dont think we acted all weird and stuff because they are in the band. Dustin Ruth showed some cool tricks with forks and whatnot and Boone made sure we allll could see it. It was a lot of fun and I hope they all come back here to Maine (especially Ruth) soon!

Anyway I hope this blesses someone and if not it sure was fun to write...
Blessings,
~Jennanana