God and Root Canals...

I suppose like most people I spend a lot of my time thinking about money and finances and such. It dawned on me today (ok, well not today, but at some point in my life) that I, even as a Christian, focus WAY to much on this. Last week in church the verse in Matthew about worrying, was brought up and today as I was sitting in the dentists chair waiting for the lovely Novocaine to start working it again came to mind. I was warned by Dentist McDreamy (LOL) that the cavities he was drilling today were very large and he would do what he could to fill them. So I'm sitting there thinking of what the crap I'm going to do if I need ANOTHER root canal, then I realized God was with me and I started praying. I think I fell asleep for like a minute, due to this huge wave of peace which washed over my fear of finances. I prayed for the strength and wisdom to deal with the prognosis of this trip to the dentist and I asked God to provide for me to be able to fix what I needed to. I was feeling fairly confident things were going to be fine by the time the dentist stopped drilling, which I think made the outcome even worse haha. Yes, I need another root canal. When he told me I instantly began to crumble, shaky hands and a lump in my throat from trying not to cry. Which leads me to what I wanted to write about, how quickly did I began to forget that God would provide, and began worrying about money? (For those of you who don't know a root canal, with all the work it needs after the actual canal costs around $2500)
It's a strange thing to go from a complete peace to a total state of panic and "what am I going to do". At least it is for me. It makes me feel very umm, not grounded, like I thought I was. I know that everyone can always learn more and as a Christian I know God will always teach me how to trust him more and more, but I thought I was past all this. Does anyone feel me on this?
Anyway another Bible verse, very similar to the one mentioned earlier was thrust upon my brain... Luke 12:22 "Then Jesus said to his disciples: 'Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear."
Here is JESUS, yes people, JESUS HIMSELF telling us not to worry about our bodies. I'd love to lie here and say this made it all better and I'm not worrying about it, but I can't say this. I will say I did feel A LOT better and was able to trust more in my Heavenly Father with this whole thing which I think was the point of this Bible verse.
Well It's late, and I'm tired and have to get up early to run (YUCK!) before church. So good night.
Blessings,
~Jennanana

...Another Day

So this is my first official blog here on "blogspot". I'm still not sure why i'm going to blog, i guess it just sounds like fun. Anyhow...
I picked up my bass guitar today for the first time in a while. I was wicked jazzed to start playing again. So I plugged in my amp, plugged in my bass and turned the amp on. I was saddened when no noise came forth. So I fiddled with it for a few moments and decided I need a new amp. You know those times in your life when it seems EVERYTHING is going wrong and EVERYTHING is breaking and EVERYTHING is costing you a fortune? Well that's my life right now. I'm not saying this to through myself a pity party, it's just the simple truth. I just found out I need a root canal, which is a fortune in itself. The tranny in my car is surely dying a sad death, even more sad is that a new tranny will cost just as much as my freekin root canal. My sister just left to go back to school, and it's going to be a long while before I get to see her. And now my silly amp. I usually crumble when this sort of thing happens to me but I'm holding myself together surprisingly well. It's in these time when I pull myself closer to God and His word.
Speaking of God's word I have been reading the book pf Psalms every night. You know how everyone always speaks with such valor and greatness of King David (author of Psalms)? Well I've always kind of thought of him as almost a magical being. I mean God even said David was "a man after my own heart". When talked about in the churches I have been in he was portrayed as one of the most holy people that have walked this earth. But reading Psalms I find him and I very similar in many ways. I mean, he's praising God with all he has in one Psalm and in the next he is crying out "Why, why have you forsaken me?" Isn't this just like me? I have these moments in my life where I am at perfect peace in God, where everything could be going wrong but I can't help but smile and praise God with my hands lifted and my eyes watering, and thats ALL I can think of. But then I have these days where I cry myself to sleep thinking of all I have lost over the past 2 years, and asking God "where were you when I needed you to intercede for my well being". I know this is a foolish question to ask someone who died for me to have an abundant and eternal life, but sometimes it's easy to get tripped up in all the sadness of this world. I just read Psalm 23 last night, and it feels like something that would have been written after a turbulent and trying time. It's used so often everywere, that I think people take it's beauty and truth for granted. I don't know who will be reading this but whoever you are I urge you to go open a Bible and read Psalm 23, I mean really read it. Imagine you are David and your soul is being restored, as God's staff protects you as He makes your enemies a foot stool. It's amazing.
Well, I think thats all I have to say today.
Blessings,
~Jennanana